The Hurt You Feel When Told, "What's Wrong with You?"

Have you ever been asked, “What’s wrong with you?”

It’s a heavy question. It lingers in the air, clings to your thoughts, and stirs up self-doubt that wasn’t even there a moment ago.

But let’s get one thing straight: the real answer is nothing. Nothing is wrong with you.

Yet, that single question has a way of making you feel like maybe there is. Like maybe you’re broken, difficult, or just too much.

Let’s unpack what’s really happening when someone says this to you—and, more importantly, how to take back your power.

Why This Question Cuts So Deep

The reason “What’s wrong with you?” stings isn’t just about the words—it’s about what they trigger inside you.

This question has a sneaky way of pulling up:

• Every moment you’ve ever felt not good enough
• Every doubt you’ve ever had about whether you belong
• Every time you’ve wondered, “Am I the problem?”

Even if the person asking didn’t mean to cut deep, the words stick. They take on a life of their own, looping in your mind, making you second-guess yourself, your reactions, even your worth.

💡 If this resonates, The Feelings Guide can help you process what you’re experiencing, giving you the words to name your emotions and reclaim your truth. Get it here.

Why People Say This (It’s Not About You)

When someone says “What’s wrong with you?”, it often has nothing to do with you—and everything to do with them.

Here’s why they do it:

• 🚩 To deflect attention from their own actions – Instead of owning their behavior, they shift the focus to you.
• 🚩 To make you doubt yourself – This is a common tactic used by toxic people to keep you questioning your reality.
• 🚩 To stir up drama – Some people thrive on emotional reactions, and this question is designed to spark one.

It’s not about your flaws—it’s about their need to control the conversation.

The Thought Spiral: How This Question Traps You

One of the hardest parts about being asked “What’s wrong with you?” is that it doesn’t just hurt in the moment—it lingers.

Suddenly, your brain is in detective mode, digging through past mistakes, embarrassing moments, and old wounds, trying to find “proof” that something really is wrong with you.

But here’s the truth: this mental loop is a trap.

You don’t need to collect evidence against yourself. You don’t need to justify who you are.

💡 If negative thoughts have been running the show, The Detach From Negative Thoughts Workbook can help you break free from overthinking and self-doubt. Grab it here.

How to Take Back Your Power

If you’ve ever been on the receiving end of “What’s wrong with you?”, here’s how you shift the narrative:

✔ Challenge the Thought – Instead of letting it spiral, ask yourself: Would I say this to someone I love? If not, don’t accept it for yourself.

✔ Flip the Question – Instead of “What’s wrong with me?”, ask:
💡 “What’s RIGHT with me?”
💡 “Why do I deserve kindness in this moment?”
💡 “What do I know to be true about myself?”

✔ Rebuild Your Self-Worth – If self-doubt has been chipping away at your confidence, it’s time to take it back.

💡 The You're Worth More: Weekly Reminders to See Your Self-Worth Differently Email Series delivers small, powerful mindset shifts each week to help you trust yourself again. Join here.

Final Thoughts: You Are More Than Their Words

The next time someone asks, “What’s wrong with you?”, remember: their words don’t define you.

You are not broken. You are not “too much.” You are not a problem to be fixed.

📌 If you need support processing your emotions, start with The Feelings Guide. 

📌 If your thoughts have been spiraling, The Detach From Negative Thoughts Workbook will help.

📌 If self-doubt has been weighing you down, The You're Worth More: Weekly Reminders to See Your Self-Worth Differently Email Series is here for

✨ You are worthy of kindness—especially from yourself.